The Shift Network Blog

Lee Doyle
By Lee Doyle
Shift Team

Do you seek approval from others as a way to avoid feelings of unworthiness?

If you make a mistake, do you get lost in the rabbit hole of self-judgement?

These are all examples of core emotional shame.

This powerful force, deep within, can cause us to react in unhealthy ways. The false belief that we’re flawed or unlovable can be so painful to acknowledge that we’ll do anything to avoid or suppress it.

For many of us, core shame is connected to our survival and can lead to self-abandonment, approval-seeking or addictions.  

For many years, core shame kept me from taking full responsibility for my own feelings, my needs, and my mistakes, especially in my intimate relationships.

While for the most part, I’ve learned to avoid the shame spiral, the core shame hasn’t budged. As a result, if I get triggered by a person or situation, I might slip back into people-pleasing mode. Or I might binge on TV or sugar (or both!), shop compulsively , or clean obsessively in an attempt to calm my anxiety.

These coping strategies further disconnect me from my higher self… and from God.  

Through the work of Dr. Margaret Paul, co-founder of the Inner Bonding process, I discovered, it’s actually possible to stop abandoning myself at this basic level and completely dissolve core shame.

In the short video below, Dr. Margaret illuminates the causes, conditions, and cure for core shame. Watch as she shares about its origins and the magic that happens when we begin to heal…

 

Don’t miss Dr. Margaret’s loving insights about healing core shame in this 5-minute video:

  • (0:07) — What is core shame? 
  • (0:30) — Are you addicted to approval?
  • (1:25) — Healing core shame is easier than you may think
  • (1:45) — The link between control, perfectionism and core shame
  • (3:23) — The truth about your essence: “You are a spark of the Divine”
  • (4:30) — Dissolving core shame through Inner Bonding 

In this video, Dr. Margaret reveals that as children, we can develop core shame as a coping mechanism to keep from facing the devastating reality of caregivers who weren’t able to fully love us because of their own wounding.  

And don’t miss her powerful insight on how core shame simply falls away… to reveal your true essence…worthy and beautiful.  

There’s no need to seek approval or control others to feel loved because you ARE loved.  

How do you experience shame? Do tend to defend or blame when you make a mistake?  What kind of healing have you done around the emotion of shame?  We’d love to hear from you!


Learn more about dissolving core shame and loving yourself — in Margaret Paul’s FREE class The Keys to Finally, Truly Loving Yourself: Discover Inner Bonding Practices for Self-Love, Authentic Relationships & Deep Healing

Did you discover something new from Margaret Paul in this article or elsewhere?  Share your thoughts in the comments below.